Jul 16th 10 @ 12:02 am

  • 09:33 Je ne veux pas travailler. #
  • 09:34 @thatrunnerchick run in that fucking graveyard, that was an obnoxius hill #
  • 10:19 Oksana offends me too Mel #
  • 10:20 @thatrunnerchick that one I was at in marblow #
  • 11:08 @jillsmallman apparently mel thinks 5 million earns you blowjobs. I agree with him. #
  • 15:39 I am going to buy The Edge of Darkness tonight. #
  • 16:14 @johnzothegreat I will support Mel. #
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Jul 15th 10 @ 12:02 am

  • 07:39 Censoring slurs in movies about racism seems stupid to me. #
  • 08:44 Why is it that the shoes that I think look the best are also always the most expensive? #
  • 09:00 @EyeOfJackieChan who do you think can kick harder, you or Beckham? #
  • 10:55 @allieq and yet cheap women look sexy, go figure. #
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Jul 14th 10 @ 12:02 am

  • 07:38 Am I the only one who loled that the chick in Predators was IDF? #
  • 14:01 I fucking love Mel Gibson. I will go see every movie he is in from this day on. #
  • 14:58 @jillsmallman that was like nonuglies jillemo. #
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Jul 13th 10 @ 12:02 am

  • 17:08 So glad I have AC in my car! #
  • 18:46 @jillsmallman you are also a girl so you must be extra dumb. #
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Jul 12th 10 @ 12:02 am


  • 19:09 Kuboa #

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Jul 9th 10 @ 12:02 am

  • 08:46 I hate working with poorly designed APIs. #
  • 10:24 Why are dudes peeing so close to the urinal? Its just a dick, we've all seen them, unless yours is tiny whats the big deal? #
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Jul 7th 10 @ 12:02 am

  • 09:28 @thatrunnerchick I cant believe you didnt come to the graveyard. You are a jerk. #
  • 10:13 @thatrunnerchick I told you I was up there! #
  • 10:48 If statements without braces are a mortal sin against the gods of style. #
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Jul 6th 10 @ 12:02 am

  • 15:48 Good day to be sitting poolside. #
  • 18:49 Animals love me. They are terrible judges of character. #
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Jul 5th 10 @ 12:02 am

  • 16:41 I dont go grocery shopping - I go grocery buying. #
  • 18:51 Sprint, who are you trying to trick? We all know you are a joke. Even AT&T is better than you. #
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Jul 4th 10 @ 12:02 am

  • 18:46 Pee Wee Herman live on Broadway might be one of the rare events that could get me into the city. #
  • 21:41 Cmon, where is the big finish already? #
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Jul 2nd 10 @ 12:02 am

  • 08:50 United Health has one of the worst websites I have ever used. My account is fucked now because they don't think users will click "back". #
  • 09:06 Also, UnitedHealthcare, how about getting a fucking email address? I don't want to call you; I'm not an old person. #
  • 13:16 I've been called by an interviewer and two head hunters today. I feel so popular! Like the cute overly drunk girl at the bar. #
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Jul 1st 10 @ 12:03 am

  • 13:36 @jillsmallman I am going to see it on imax Thursday night and you are wicked jealous. #
  • 13:39 My coworker and I bought soccer balls during lunch. #
  • 19:31 @jillsmallman I see knee you hussy. #
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Jun 30th 10 @ 12:02 am

  • 10:29 Work has become truly sisyphean in nature. #
  • 13:49 Picked up my eclipse tickets. Squee! #
  • 14:03 Just entered the @SoleCollector McFly Hyperdunk Giveaway. Follow @SoleCollector and RT to enter. xr.com/SoleMcFly #
  • 20:13 I don't have slide rule envy - stop listing programmer jobs as engineering positions. Engineers are fucking nerds. Ugly smell nerds. #
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Jun 28th 10 @ 12:03 am

  • 11:28 The German attack is as fast as lightning. #
  • 11:44 My great grandfathers birth certificate came in the mail. One step closer to being able to flee to europe. #
  • 14:59 Man I thought NBA refs were bad, this is some terrible officiating. #
  • 17:42 Stepp Blatter is punishing the world for having such a fucking terrible name. #
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Jun 27th 10 @ 12:02 am


  • 10:03 Beauty is the promise of happiness, except in women where it is the promise of bitchiness. #

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Jun 26th 10 @ 12:03 am


  • 08:23 Hey spam, fuck you - I have awesome credit and a huge penis and I am tired of you trying to tell me otherwise. #

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Jun 25th 10 @ 12:03 am

  • 07:48 @cachanchan No, they're also pretty big. #
  • 15:01 Japan is awesome at soccer. #
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Jun 24th 10 @ 12:03 am


  • 12:18 I feel like the US squad should be given a better nickname than just The Yanks. #

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Jun 22nd 10 @ 12:03 am

  • 06:57 @thatrunnerchick Aren't you going to tweet the picture he took? #
  • 10:49 I need to start using a damn calender. #
  • 12:42 @DJInvictus Become a morning person. Morning people are better than lazy people. #
  • 12:50 www.youtube.com/watch?v=xhFgqJrIaBQ&feature=youtube_gdata (Here's a cool YouTube video) #
  • 14:00 @DawaunParker That sounds like something Confucius would say. #
  • 15:56 I say they boot the French out of the world cup and let Ireland take their spot for the last game of group play. #
  • 16:41 With the latest update I am now able to play Nethack on my phone. This is good. #
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Jun 21st 10 @ 12:02 am

  • 08:57 Speakerphone in Starbucks - well thats a new one. I wonder if she is just obnoxious or if she knows hearing half a conversation is annoying. #
  • 10:46 I smashed a pizza stone with my bare hands. I am a beast. #
  • 19:11 I am going to tear through pub quiz like Rambo tore through sherrifs/VC/Russians. #
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